Well, another weekend of crappiness on my part… Although I do not blame myself totally. I have been sick.. on antibiotics that make me sick. We had a wonderful afternoon the other day. drove out and just enjoyed the outdoors… I felt okay.. but the heat was a gasser. I appreciate Ray for all that he does.. and when I start feeling sorry for myself, nitpicking about what he does not do, I end up feeling bad and making him feel bad. I feel insecure sometimes. I feel I invest in this relationship that I have no idea that if it is going to work or not. He is VERY into his job and that is great. He loves it, he is great at it. I have never seen someone more adept at their jobs that he is. I just tend to feel left out sometimes. He is so focused on what he does that I am left to do whatever it is I wanna do.. .when a lot of this time, I want to be with him. Sometimes our timing and thoughts clash. Yes, he is worth all the crap for me to be with him, I am just not sure he feels that same way about me. I don’t feel as if I can share my feelings with him. He is very difficult to deal with because I don’t think he is able to comprehend that people think differently than he does… Women, for instance, I believe that he thinks I am a babbling bitch most of the time… but I don’t feel that I am like that.. maybe sometimes, about one or two times a month… but he says it is more like once a week. Really??? So, I am left feeling as if I have done something wrong to act this way… and I feel like a screw-up. Why?
Just a thought…
It seems I am more creative when I am bitchy. See there, PMS has it’s upside. Now that the Red Plague has moved on, I am into sinus mode. UGH. Not the same as a hormonal rage… no benefits from sinus pain and headache. I don’t even feel up to being a bitch with sinus problems. I know there is a sigh of relief in my house when I am not hormonally challenged but when I am sick, I just want to be a veggie. I go July 2nd for allergy testing. Hope I find out what is going on so that I can manage it all. It gets worse every year.
Well, time to get humpday started. Rather climb back under the covers and hide, but where will that get me… hmmm…
Have a great day !!!
Thanks Lena.
Thanks Lena.
Morning after weekend…
Busy weekend… actually a very wonderful weekend. Only had to take Midol two times… WOW. It seems that I am in a good mood regardless of my hormones depending on what animal I am around. Snakes are ok.. Bison are wonderful… bats aresoothing… Men.. oh dear.tolerable.. Deer??? well, yes those are quite wonderful. We went down to Caprock Canyons State Park Texas and camped under the stars. Got to see all of the above, very upclose and persoal. We had a great time. Let’s just say, Ray does know that a good airconditioned nap in a bunkhouse during the heat of the day is the way to treat a PMSing woman. I even opened all of the gates that we had to go through. I figured the activity would help with backaches 🙂 . It seems that the free-range Bison at Caprock Canyons are having some hormonal issues themselves. It is almost rut for them and the females are about as interested in the young bucks as a very hormonal woman is in a man that is wanting to play around. The males are all… well… you know… “wanting it” and the females are not ready yet and seem to be a little put off with the situation. But in a couple of weeks… watch out.. They will be dolling up and ready for a man.
Well, I am tired and ready for a nap and Ray, well he just wants to work as usual.. cleaning all of his gear.. looking at videos.. Sleep first for me, then hmmm probably more sleep. Work for me is tomorrow.
Have a wonderful week and I will check in soon.
P.M.S.
Oh my. I do think that about sums me up…
Women are like the beautiful cactus. We are beautiful.. but we have some needles that will stick you if you are not careful.. but most of us grow where we are planted even if it is in the desert heat out of the side of a rock.
My (hopefully) Insightful PMS Rantz 